I am turning 21 in a matter of months and I have been thinking about my teenage self and what things I would have done differently and what advice I should have listened to. My sister is 13 and just beginning her journey into that long awkward round into adolescenthood, she is constantly asking me advice and I see her every day arguing with friends or getting excited over boys and I wish that I could tell her what I wish I would have known then without her saying "yeah well whatever jess!" Trying to steer her in the right direction at every opportunity. If I could go back now this is what tell my teenage self;
To my teenage self,
1. You shouldn't care what these people think
My mum always said to me "you are not going to know these people in ten years time, you shouldn't stop being yourself for them". Turns out she was exactly right I do not talk to anyone from my secondary school neither do I have any desire to. I used to wear my hair in a way that everybody else had it and wear the same things even if I didn't necessarily like them. I also played the class clown and I wouldn't put ad much effort into my school work and I didn't reach my full potential that was entirely my fault all of this just incase my class mates thought I was uncool, this was the biggest mistake. Now none of their opinions matter to me and I wish I had known that then.
2. Not everyone is going to like you
I spent years and years thinking everyone must like me. I still to this day care if people like me or not because it's not nice having someone not like you, but now I think well sod them and its human nature not to like everyone, whereas when I was in my teenage years if someone didn't like me it played on my mind and took over my life like the plague, it made me change myself to suit them, I wish that I had been myself throughout because you should always want people to like you for you not who they want you to be. There are some that will like and some that just wont it's just the way it's meant to be, some people will like them and some people and more than likely you wont like them, it's just natures way of telling us who matters.
3.Remember the positives and forget the negatives
It's definitely easier to listen to the negatives than the positives and again when I was younger the littlest nasty thing would eat away at me, the numerous positive comments would just go straight over my head, when it should have been the other way around. If I had listened to some of the positive comments I probably wouldn't have needed the other advice.
4. Side ponytails and dream matt moose foundation are not the answer!
Oh god I look back at some of the horrendous fashion and beauty mistakes I have made back then and well there is not much more to say here other than make better choices and when your mum says "darling you look stupid" take note! In my school all the girls went through a Dream Matt Moose Foundation phase, for those of you who do not know what dream matt moose is it is the driest, cakeyest foundation them points alone should have made me realise that it does not look good when you could literally scrape your fingers nails on my face, and it looks like cake (not the nice kind) or I would even go as far as saying mud is falling off your face, but to top it all off we all bought the darkest shade to make us look tanned but it made us look dirty and so so so wrong with our faces looking like they were covered in mud and dirty and our bodies as pale as a polar bear!
5. Enjoy being young
This one is simple do grow up to fast! When people say "your only young for a little while" they really are not lying. I am quickly becoming an adult and I wish I hadn't spent of much time obsessive over looking older with my horrendous foundation or my heels that I couldn't walk in or acting (but probably seeming so much younger) older or getting fake ID to get in the clubs and bars because I was so desperate to be older. I wish I had spent more time playing with my dollies and riding my scooter and watching the powerpuff girls instead of eastenders.
(Honestly what was I thinking!)
There you have it.. Cor I wish I had a time machine to go back and shake my teenage self!
Until next time,
Jess xx
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